When it's time to party, we will party hard.
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Washington D.C. Extravaganza
Some friends and I decided to kill two birds with one stone a couple of weeks ago. Celebrate my birthday and partake in one of the greatest drink specials known to man. And when I say great, I mean grizzity great.Our first destination for the night was 1223. A bar/club/lounge in northwest D.C. Conveniently, the name of the bar is the number of the building. That's some quick goat thinkin'.
Remember the drink special I was talking about three lines earlier? Well here it is. While you read this next part, think of the THX, "Deep Note", playing in the background (the THX logo with the synthesized tone that plays before some movies).
----Begin THX "Deep Note"
All you can drink for $20, top-shelf alcohol, from 5-9pm. Can you deal with that!
----End THX "Deep Note"
That's right! Enjoy various top-shelf liquors, including, Makers Mark, Patron, Remy Martin, and Grey Goose, in unlimited quantity for only $20 for four hours.
At the end of the night my tab would have been between $75 and $100. I had a Courvoisier and Cranberry, and I don't even like Cognac. But what the hell, when's the next time I'll take a sip of an expensive alcoholic beverage and smugly dismiss it. Actually I drank it because I enjoyed the part of the drink that was alcoholic. I think I would make a really good pompous jerk.
If anyone knows of a better drink special out there, I'd like to know where it is. 25 cent draft specials are not accepted.
The only thing better than recklessly drinking high-priced liquor is stumbling to an, out of the way, basement eatery and stuffing slices of super-cheap, super-greasy pizza in my mouth like I hadn't eaten in days.
The only problem, which isn't a real problem, is the bathroom. Just because a bar has a bathroom attendant it doesn't make, said bar, appear classy. It's like paying to use the bathroom. If you do your business and wash your hands, their is no way you can't give him some gratuity. You wash your hands and take that single paper towel square he offers and place your dollar on the tray. If you commit to the full service wash and dry, and don't tip, you can't even look at him. You'll feel like a jerk and a failure as a human being. It's even worse if you only have a $5 or larger but no $1. I feel like such an ass that I want to tell him to take a break and I'll look over things while he's gone. And people better tip me. Hangin' out with wizz all night, gross.
If the bathroom attendant was playing five gallon buckets with screw drivers or was painted silver and danced the robot, I would gladly hand over a dollar. While I'm washing my hands and looking myself over in the mirror, he could give me a pep talk or something. He could say "Look at you. You are a handsome man. You have a lot to offer the world. Now get out there and be somebody!" Again, a crisp dollar heading his way, maybe even two.
After 1223 we took a cab over to Ultrabar. I didn't know that cab drivers are like seventeen year old girls when it comes to talking on the phone. Leaving Ultrabar we hopped in another cab back to 1223 and during both trips the cab drivers were gabbing like high school girls gossiping about teen heartthrobs in Tigerbeat.
Not impressed with Ultrabar. I expected blood to start pouring from the sprinklers, then Blade crashing in through the ceiling and killing vampires. I kind of wished that happened because I'm not a big fan of techno. Untz, untz, untz, untz, untz, untz (my techno beat). A little to much untz for me. I'm not saying Ultrabar isn't fun, I'm more into the lounge scene.
In conclusion, 1223 is fun and the people at Ultrabar try too hard. Peace, I'm outta here!
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